Bret Legg 
I heard an interview the other day with a doctor who had gone to Syria to take care of children caught in the war there. The doctor spoke of children and families being torn apart, physically, emotionally and relationally by the on-going war. There may be times when war is unavoidable, but it’s never good.
The same is true when marriages “got to war.”
Ever have one of those days? The other day, I had gone out for a walk. It was a great walk. The morning was beautiful, my heart was peaceful, and I was able to prepare my mind for the day ahead.
When I got back home, I took off my shoes and socks and headed for the shower. Then it happened…
I stepped in cat puke. In my bare feet! I was stunned. I remember thinking, “This can’t be what I think it is!” I stood there like a statute with one foot in the air, wondering, “How do I get to the paper towels in the kitchen without tracking this from room to room?” Then I thought, “This isn’t even my cat!” (We were cat sitting at the time.)
Have you ever been listening to someone talk about something and thought to yourself, “Come on! Just get to the point! What’s the bottom line?!” Well, for the last 3 posts we’ve been talking about how to better live with your in-laws and now it’s time to get to the point. What’s the bottom line on how to better live with your in-laws? Believe it or not, it really all boils down to one principle, one practice, and one parting thought.
In our laundry room, we have a door on which there are several hooks. On these hooks, we hang things like coats and scarves; anything we might need to grab on our way out the door.
Maybe you have some hooks in your home. They may be on a door or on a wall. They may be in a bathroom or a utility room. But wherever they are, they’re a place to hang things that you don’t want to put away, because you’re going to need them.
In the last post, we talked about the tug-of-war that comes with learning to live with your in-laws. In this post, we’ll look at 5 steps to improve your relationship with your in-laws. You may be thinking, “It can’t be that easy!” Well, notice that I said 5 steps to improve the relationship, not 5 steps to make the relationship the way you want it to be. So, let’s look at the 5 steps.
In the last post, we began looking at how to better live with your in-laws. When you get married, in-laws are part of the package. There can can be some really good things about your in-laws, and there can be some really difficult things about your in-laws. Unfortunately, you get both. It’s a package deal.
Marriage initiates two new tensions into your life. Each of these tensions is like an internal tug-of-war that you can’t avoid. Let’s look at the two primary areas where you’ll feel this tug-of-war.
I know life is too complex to be reduced to a few bullet points of simple advice. That kind of thing usually bothers me. But sometimes you just need something quick and simple to hold on to. So here are a few bullet points for life that will help you change your thinking and take some pressure off…
“Meet the Parents” is a movie that looks at learning to accept and be accepted by future in-laws. The movie is funny at times, awkward at times and down right painful at times. Hopefully your experience with in-laws has been better.
When my wife and I announced to her parents we were getting married, (yeah, I know…we should have asked rather than announce) they were not overjoyed.
Discontentment is dissatisfaction with the current situation. It can be the push we need to make things better, or the pull we feel that makes things worse. It can be our fuel or our failure.
Discontentment is a powerful motivator. JFK used discontentment to help our country put a man on the moon. Advertising uses discontentment to convince us that what we have is not good enough. Spouses use discontentment to either improve their marriage or end their marriage.
We all want to be successful, whether it’s in business, raising kids, or marriage. We often hesitate to do something if we’re not sure it’s the “right” thing to do, because we equate unsuccessful attempts with failure.
When you equate unsuccessful attempts with failure, then you play it safe. You shy way from trying new and different things so as to not fail. The end result is that your life and your options become more constricted and you become less free.