difficulties 5 | Bret Legg

Marriage Is Like Baseball

April 16, 2018March 17, 2015 by Bret Legg

I often tell couples that marriage is like baseball. The key is knowing which pitches to swing at and which pitches to let go by. Others have said the key to marriage is figuring out which hills are too small to die on. However you describe it, there are times in marriage when you have to determine…is this something I should try to change or is this something I should learn to live with?”

In a podcast entitled “Managing Tension,” Andy Stanley talks about determining the difference between a problem to be solved and a tension to be managed. He is speaking to leaders of organizations, but I believe the concept is also applicable to spouses in marriage.

Accumulation or Appreciation?

June 14, 2022March 5, 2015 by Bret Legg

Maybe you’ve seen this…a preschooler is sitting on the floor playing with a toy. They’re perfectly content with the toy they have, until they see another child playing with a different toy. Then the preschooler wants the toy the other child has. They don’t want to just exchange toys. They want both toys!

It’s funny in preschoolers, but it’s not so funny in adults. Yet so many of us get caught up in accumulating things rather than appreciating what we have.

Dissatisfaction in Marriage

April 16, 2018March 3, 2015 by Bret Legg

To be married is to know dissatisfaction. That statement will probably get me in trouble, but it’s true. You can’t live with someone who is different than you and not experience some dissatisfaction. Your spouse won’t make the same decisions you would make. They will correct you at times. Their priorities will be different than yours. You won’t like all their habits and quirks. No matter how great your spouse might be, being married to them will bring a certain amount of dissatisfaction.

User Friendly Spouse?

April 16, 2018January 13, 2015 by Bret Legg

I’m an Apple Computer guy. From my very first MacBook years ago, I’ve been smitten with Apple products. Why? Basically because I find them to be very user friendly.

You may not care what brand of computer you use. You may not even care about computers in general, but if you’re married you do need to care about being more user friendly.

Small Changes Can Have A Big Impact

April 16, 2018January 6, 2015 by Bret Legg

What if a better marriage didn’t demand a major over-haul? What if you could have a better marriage by making small changes?

I believe that small changes can have a big impact in marriage. Think about it this way…if a plane leaving L.A. for N.Y changes it’s course by just a degree or two, it will end up in a completely different part of the world! Small changes can be very powerful.

I Don’t Want To!

June 14, 2022December 11, 2014 by Bret Legg

Remember when you were a kid and your parents told you to do something you didn’t want to do? Maybe it was to clean up your room, or to take a bath, or to do your homework. Whatever it was, you just didn’t want to do it.

So what would you do? You would stall. You would “forget.” You would try to get around it. Maybe you would even feel a surge of independence and say, “I don’t want to!” To which your parent would say something like, “I don’t care if you don’t want to. Do it anyway!” And you would wind up having to do it, but you would tell yourself, “When I become an adult, I won’t do things I don’t want to do!”

Has Your Marriage Moved From Breathtaking To Frustrating?

April 16, 2018November 25, 2014 by Bret Legg

I’ve never been to the Grand Canyon, but I’ve talked to people who have and they tell me it’s breathtaking. They say you’ll stand in awe of the beauty of this masterpiece of creation.

Yet if you lived there all your life, the familiarity would probably cause it to seem less breathtaking. You would probably focus more on jagged rocks, dust and dirt, lack of greenery, over abundance of tourists…you get the idea.

We do the same thing in marriage.

Stepping in Cat Puke

June 14, 2022November 13, 2014 by Bret Legg

Ever have one of those days? The other day, I had gone out for a walk. It was a great walk. The morning was beautiful, my heart was peaceful, and I was able to prepare my mind for the day ahead.

When I got back home, I took off my shoes and socks and headed for the shower. Then it happened…

I stepped in cat puke. In my bare feet! I was stunned. I remember thinking, “This can’t be what I think it is!” I stood there like a statute with one foot in the air, wondering, “How do I get to the paper towels in the kitchen without tracking this from room to room?” Then I thought, “This isn’t even my cat!” (We were cat sitting at the time.)

Discontentment

April 16, 2018October 16, 2014 by Bret Legg

Discontentment is dissatisfaction with the current situation. It can be the push we need to make things better, or the pull we feel that makes things worse. It can be our fuel or our failure.

Discontentment is a powerful motivator. JFK used discontentment to help our country put a man on the moon. Advertising uses discontentment to convince us that what we have is not good enough. Spouses use discontentment to either improve their marriage or end their marriage.

Marital Climate Change

April 16, 2018September 23, 2014 by Bret Legg

Is climate change affecting your marriage?

These days, the subject of climate change is all over the media. Though there are differing opinions on the subject, one thing is for sure. Marital climate change is real.