Bret Legg 
About 3 months ago, Connie Plummer (a fellow staffer) sent me something to remind me of the importance of pausing occasionally in life. It was so relevant, I asked her for permission to use it as a guest post. So pause for a moment and enjoy these wise words about pausing from Connie Plummer.
When you’re dating, holding hands is one of the first big milestones. Getting there can be awkward, but once you’re holding hands, you feel it…”We’re a couple.”
Holding hands when married can be much the same. It can be a little awkward at times, but it can also carry the same “We’re a couple!” feeling.
I know that’s kind of an odd question to ask, but think about it. What if you encountered the infinite daily? Would it scare you? Would you question your sanity? How would it change your outlook? How would it change how you lived? How would it change you?
Did you ever do any school lunch trading when you were a kid? You know…you look in the lunch bag your mom packed and you find something you really don’t want. Something you would like to trade for something else.
Marriage can be that way. A few years into your marriage, you can find things in the marriage bag you didn’t really want. Things you wish you could trade for something else.
When I talk about 3 ways to make time, I am not talking about sexual encounters or getting to a destination quicker. I’m talking about dealing with the pressure of feeling like you need more time.
We often talk about needing to make time for things like our marriage, our kids, our friends, our hobbies, our health, our (fill in the blank.)
There are several reasons why we often feel we don’t have enough time to do what we need to do…
Every baseball player wants to hit a home run. They want to know that feeling of seeing the ball go over the fence.
The same is true in marriage. We all want a marriage that powerfully connects and soars over the fence. We all want a home run marriage.
But what about those of us who are just average batters. What about those of us who have normal marriages…not home run marriages?
There are people in this world who are just difficult people. Maybe they…
Whatever the reason, difficult people make life difficult. So what can you do about them…without getting thrown in jail?
My spouse and I differ in a lot of ways, but there’s one very big difference between us. It’s not related to money, or sex, or kids, or in-laws. It’s much more serious. It’s about super hero movies vs Hallmark movies. This difference has been there from the day we got married, and it produces groans and eye-rolling to this day. What do you do when this happens?
A “foxhole prayer” is a prayer you pray when things are difficult and pressing. A test you’ve not studied for. The fear of an unwanted pregnancy. A sudden job loss. A terminal diagnosis. Such things can cause even non-religious people to pray a foxhole prayer that sounds something like this: “God, if you’ll just fix this then I’ll do that.”
But what about a “before the foxhole prayer?”
Ever notice the difference between the dating couples from the married couples in a restaurant?
The dating couples are animated. They’re looking at each other, leaning into the conversation, laughing, asking questions, and telling stories.