Derailing Disappointment

If you’ve ever been disappointed, you know how easy it is for disappointment to derail you.

I see this with my grandchildren. They always have a list of things they want: “I want to go outside and play.” “I want to go out to eat pizza.” “I want to rent a movie.” “I want a snack.” “I want to spend the night.” If something gets in the way of what they want, it can throw them into a funk from which they have a hard time recovering.

But it’s not just children who struggle with disappointment.

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Rescue Your Marriage From the “If Only’s”

Have you ever regretted something, and the more you thought about it the more you found yourself saying, “If only”? Maybe it was something you said, or something you did, or a decision you made, but whatever it was left you with regret and the reverberation of “if only.”

We all have those “if only” regrets. They sound something like this:

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How to Find What You’re Looking For in Marriage: Lessons From Hunting Mushrooms

We decide to get married because we’re looking for something and we believe we’ve found it in our spouse. But a few years into the marriage, we’re still looking for something and we’re wondering why our spouse is withholding it. What happened?

There’s a general principle in life and marriage, and it’s this: we tend to find what we’re looking for. It was true when you were dating, and it’s still true now in your marriage. But what happens is we change what we’re looking for.

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What Makes a Good Marriage Story – Part 6: The Action

(The posts in this series have been adapted from the “Relentless Love” marriage seminar, created and taught by David McKinley and Bret Legg at Prestonwood Baptist Church in Dallas, TX.)

If you’ve been following this series from the beginning, you already know about many of the parts of a good marriage story. You know about the author, the characters, the obstacles, and the guide.

But just having the parts of a good marriage story does not magically make the story, anymore than having the ingredients for a good cake magically makes the cake. You have to do something with those parts. You must take action and make the most of what you have if you’re going to make a great marriage story. 

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What Makes a Good Marriage Story – Part 4: The Obstacles

(The posts in this series have been adapted from the “Relentless Love” marriage seminar, created and taught by David McKinley and Bret Legg at Prestonwood Baptist Church in Dallas, TX.)

In this series, we’re looking at your marriage as if it were a story and what goes into making it a good story that you and others want to read. There are certain elements every marriage needs in order to tell a good story, starting with a good author and two main characters who are playing their parts well.

In a good story, the main characters are in pursuit of something they believe will bring them happiness and fulfillment. But that which the characters seek is never easily achieved. Just as they’re about to get what they want, something happens that thwarts their desire. There’s some sort of set back or defeat that puts what they want just out of their reach.

Read moreWhat Makes a Good Marriage Story – Part 4: The Obstacles

When You Can’t Find the Merry in Christmas

We just put our Christmas decorations up…five days before Christmas! No, we’re not Scrooges and no, this is not typical for us.

We were going to have the decorations up three weeks before Christmas, but that week turned out to be more demanding than we expected. (Don’t they all?) We did stick a naked tree in a stand that week, but that’s as far as we got. Then my wife got sick a few days after that and has been sick ever since. So all we had was a naked tree in a stand five days before Christmas.

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What I’ve Learned About Marriage From Buying a House – Part 4

Let me just cut to the chase here. One of the things I’ve learned from this house buying experience is that if you want to get from the house you have to the house you want…it’s going to cost you.

Certainly there’s the cost of the new mortgage, but there’s also expenses like fees, repairs to your current house, appliances for the new house, and moving expenses. Then there’s the amount of time and energy you have to spend. All this can easily cause you to loose site of the ultimate goal…to get to a better place.

Read moreWhat I’ve Learned About Marriage From Buying a House – Part 4